Genesis- Meet Carena: Maternal Love #MichaelJseries #fiction


Photo by Gui Spinardi from Pexels

As told by Carena Johanssen

I know it sounds like I am a terrible person for laying up with my boss, Xander, and getting pregnant by him. And all the while doing so being a married woman. It’s a bad thing to do, I know. Not trying to discount what I’ve done, but growing up I noticed that men do shit like that all the time, and people would wave a hand saying that what men do. And wanted us to look the other way. Men are always given a pass for stuff they shouldn’t. When and if a woman does that, it’s deemed as not ladylike and morally wrong. Whatever.

Anyway, an innocent child came out of my affair and it is a responsibility that I had to take care of. Though, still I had held my head high amidst the fact that my son was growing in my womb then. Held my head high when pushing him in his stroller wherever we would go. I am a Native American woman from the Iroquois tribe who caused what they called a scandal with a Greek man who owned a business that was blossoming. From what people say, the two races should not have mixed. Anyway, why should they care?

From Canada to the States, I had endured the fights, arguments, name-calling, you name it from my family and husband’s, and that’s including from my husband, Jarren himself as well. Yeah, I know what I’ve done, and still to this day, some people won’t let me forget it, especially when they see Michael. I wish they would stop womb-watching and stop worrying about what I do with my vagina.

It was already bad enough that I had to quit my job which I thought was a good idea at the time. There was no way I could see Xander’s face every day. Jarren had me to be something I didn’t want to be and that is to be a stay-at-home mom. It was Jarren’s idea. I was never to work again outside the home. So, sometimes after my last child, I started making my own money by making oils and soaps for people and other spiritual stuff.

It’s quiet in the house now because all five of my children are gone. The oldest is living with her husband and their triplets in Italy. The next two are in college. Michael just started college living in a dorm with his friend Craig, and the youngest is a junior and hates high school now that Michael isn’t there anymore.

Let me say this, it was hard as hell raising Michael; not because of him, but the reminder from my mother-in-law that I was “a slut”, and my husband’s constant anger that only started since my affair. And to top it off, Xander harassed me so bad about being in our son’s life that we had to move to another country. He literally had people follow me everywhere whenever he couldn’t. And he even followed Michael and had people at his school, either working there or otherwise to “keep watch” over him.

Now, I feel like the worst had already happened. Michael graduated from high school and started college; and, he’s passed the age where I don’t have to be a hovering mother anymore. Though he is of legal age now to make his own decisions now, you know I am always going to be Mommy. I want the best for my son and I never forget the day Jarren wanted to help raise Michael.

I stood up from where I sat and walked over to the fireplace and touched the frame that held a picture of Michael when he graduated. Thinking back to a couple months ago, when there was nearly a fight in the backyard when Xander brought our son back from wherever he took him. That and everything hasn’t really taken its toll. And, I thought believing that if I allow Xander to come see Michael whenever he wanted to see him would keep him for taking me to court for joint custody. And also to keep him from harassing me so much. Well, he didn’t take me to court in which he most likely would win the case, but he still didn’t stop making matters worse.

I’ve done whatever I could to protect my child like I would for any other. And that’s including moving to the States in which he followed us and found out where we lived. It seems like I spent most of my son’s life just fighting for him. Oh, I am tired just thinking about it.

As I paced the dark carpet in front of the fireplace still deep in thought, I heard a lock being turned at the front door. Thinking it was my youngest daughter coming home, I called out to her to ask about her day.

“It’s me, CeCe!” Jarren called out instead, holding a large black bag in his hand, and wearing a sneaky smile on his handsome face.

“What’s in the bag, Jay?” I asked, holding my composure while forking an eyebrow.

©2020 Pamela E. Hester

Genesis: A Long Time Coming #MondayBlogs #fiction #MichaelJseries


Photo by Augusto Lotti on Unsplash

 

Continued from: Genesis: If Only I Knew Before Now

I saw a look of horror stretched across my mom’s face. And my “dad” Jarren appeared angry as he would normally be when I’m gone too long without him knowing about it. When I got out and got my tote bags and extra bags for myself and the family, Mr. Xander rose out of the car like he was on a mission.

Next thing I knew, my “dad” angrily approached him and started shouting.

“What the hell your ass doing here?”

“Excuse me, Jarren. Karena, tell Michael that I’m his biological father.” When Mr. Xander said that, we all looked to my mom who just stared back at us.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Cynthia walking up. Damn, if only I knew before now.


If only I knew before now that Cynthia was going to show up unexpectedly, I probably would have done something to change the course of action. But no, it was too late now, and both of them was looking at my mom with different expressions on their face. I stared her way waiting just like them for her answer.

My mom glanced nervously around quickly in a 180 degrees turn. She diverted her eyes to the two women who were sitting on the porch talking animatedly about us probably. Then, my mom made a gesture for us to follow her and we all ended up going into the backyard.

My sister, Tiana calmly motioned for Cynthia to follow her and I was glad she did. I did not for the sake of my embarrassment for her to witness and hear what’s going to happen. It was too much to deal with at this time.

“So, anyone wants to tell me why Mr. Xander is saying what he’s saying?” I asked after seeing the three of them exchanged looks as if those looks could kill. I just want them or my mom rather to stop beating around the bush and just say what needs to be said already. I hate when people prolong the inevitable.

My mom lightly touches my arm and smiles sadly. The answer was in her dark brown eyes and all I could do was slap my hands against the side of my head. I really didn’t need someone else to tell me what I already know by now. Though, I feel like it was better if I could hear it from my mother’s mouth, whenever that will be.

“Michael, sit down for me, please.” And I did, a little too quickly.

As my mom took a seat next to me. I saw out of the corner of my eye, both of my dads exchanging words in a heated fashion. This weekend had gone from strange to upsetting for me. I love my mom, don’t get me wrong, but this is out of character for  her to do.

“Michael, yes, Xander is your biological father.” She actually rubbed my hands like she would do when I was a kid, and when she would explain something to me she felt I need understanding more about.

Well, I receive my truth. I already guess I should have known how Mr- uh, my birth dad treated me all along. The fact that they all knew for so long, but not that long because I’m not that old, it made me wonder if adults can ever be trusted.

“How do you feel about that, son?” my mom was asking, but any words after that was drowning out by the sound of loud arguing. I turned my head and saw my dads up in each other face, fists balled up at the sides, faces twisted in anger.

“I told you, you couldn’t keep me out of my son’s life forever!” I heard Xander say. The fatherly love that shone through his eyes when he mentioned “son” was taking the word weird to a whole new level. I mean, I feel this way because this is still new to me. Then again, this may me think about how my other dad who raised me knew he wasn’t my father yet still raised me as his own.

“You think just because you laid with my wife and she had your son that you going to keep showing your face and disrespect me? Huh? Get the hell out! You had your say. You spent time with your son, now-get-the-fuck-out. Now!” My dad Jarren was shaking and his skin appeared flushed. The stare he gave Xander was enough to engulf the man in hellish flames. I have seen him angry before, but not to this degree to Xander.

There was no way I am going to come between and stop to big grown-ass men from fighting. They are both at six feet or above and weighing perhaps 250 pounds I’m guessing. And there’s me who is 5’9 and weighing 138 pounds. Yeah, I know. I should stay out of it.

“Hey! Stop fighting!” My mom yells out, rushing over to them.

I stayed where I was and shook my head in astonishment. Like adults wanted us to do is to stay out of their business, even if it is about me I am staying out of it.

As I headed to go back to the house through the back door, one foot on the first stone step, a baritone tone called my name. I saw that it was my dad Xander.

“Michael, follow me to my car, quickly!” He grabbed my arm and before I know it he had me sprinting along with him back to his car.

“Wait! Why am I leaving with you?” I voiced, but it went on deaf ears as he literally pushed me into his car.

As I got my composure and sat up, I looked out of the window and heard my mom yelling for me to get out the car. Everyone started talking at once to the point it was becoming deafening. I was lost at what was best for me to do. My mom and dads were all angry and telling me what I should do.

At that point, I did what I wanted to do because some things haven’t changed for as long as I can remember. And that is the three of them constantly arguing and fighting over me. From keeping secrets to pushing me off to go with Xander somewhere all these years to controlling my entire life. I had enough so I got out and announce that I was going to my friend Craig’s house for the rest of the evening.

They were baffled but I didn’t care. I felt drained and adults don’t ever think how their actions can affect the child(ren). It was too much at once that I can bear. As I started walking, I saw Cynthia coming out of my house. She rushed towards me and gave me a hug.

I looked back at my parents and told them I was going to Cynthia’s instead.

©2020 Pamela E. Hester

 

Genesis: If Only I Knew Before Now- #MichaelJseries #amwriting #fiction


Image by Pexels from Pixabay

Continued from The Genesis of Michael J’s Life

“You have some nerve being here. What if my husband comes home and sees you darkening our doorstep?” She hissed at him.

“I’ve been to Michael’s graduation away from your family. Now, I’m here to see him in person. I want to spend time with our son… today.”

Karena huffed. She felt like the last bit of energy was draining out of her and she had no strength to do anything about it. She wants and needs for him to be gone before her husband come back home early.

“Fine. When are you bringing him back?”

“It should be an hour before his bedtime,” Xander smirked.

Karena shook her head, knowing that meant whenever he felt like bringing him back. She called out to Michael to grab his things because he was going out for a ride with Mr. Xander.


When I heard my mom calling out to me to pack my things, my first thought was I was going to spend the night with someone. But when I went downstairs and saw her with her arms folded appearing upset standing next to Mr. Xander, I knew something else was going on.

“Yes, mom?” I asked her, raising an eyebrow. I needed to know why I was packing my things and for what.

“Michael, you are going with Mr. Xander for a day. So pack whatever you want, okay?”

Before I could say something, Mr. Xander interrupted.

“Pack an overnight bag, just in case,” he said.

“For what?” I wanted to know.

“Well, there’s a lot we’re going to do today. Pack an overnight bag just in case it runs over into the next day.” The way he spoke that let me know that I may or may not like it.

So I nodded and turned to leave, but not before I saw my mother glaring at the dude like she wanted to yell at him about whatever. I don’t know what is up with those two, and I can’t believe I haven’t noticed that until now.

After I threw some things like two shirts, jeans, socks, underwear, that sort of thing along with toiletries, I called my best friends, Craig and Cynthia to let them know I would be out for today. I know they would be pissed since this is a last-minute thing, but they’ll understand.

When I came back to the living room with my tote bag, I noticed my mom and Mr. Xander staring at each other like they were telepathically having a conversation. I didn’t know what to make of it, and it gave me vibes that they share or once shared some type of love for each other. I cleared my throat and they immediately broke contact to look my way.

“Ready, son?” Mr. Xander asked me.

“Yeah, sure,” I said, wondering why he seems to take great pleasure in calling me, son. Like damn, yeah, I am somebody’s son but not his.

We rode around for like thirty minutes before we ended up at the Robert Mueller Airport. I glanced around through the side window wondering why we were here. A look of puzzlement settled on my face because no one told me we were going to take a flight. Or maybe he was picking someone up like his sister like the last time. All I know is, the vibes I was picking up didn’t feel right.

Don’t get me wrong. I like hanging out with the guy and I have been since I was maybe six or seven. Off-and-on was more like it, and I would constantly hear my parents argued a lot with Mr. Xander’s name coming up just as much.

“Michael, we are going to take a short flight to Austin on my private jet.” When he saw my eyebrows raised up to my forehead, he added,

“Hear me out. We are going to do something different this time. Remember when I told you it was okay to be spontaneous and to do something entirely different than before, well this is it.” He actually said that with a huge smile and twinkled eyes like he had some big secret up his sleeve. I just nodded, feeling some type of way about it.

After we retrieved our bags from the trunk, we walked to the back of the airport. Once there, we got on a white jet with black stripes, and inside was impeccable. I have never been inside a jet before- private or commercial, and I really wish I could have brought Cynthia with me. She would love this!


The day went by smoothly and sort of fast, and I am not complaining either. The activities we did with his family had brought so much fun and joy, I didn’t want to leave. His family really believes in having fun at the highest level. They also like doing things as a family, and they are so tight-knit.

Now that the day was nearing an end, I settled into the cotton sheets and brought the white and yellow bedspread over my shoulders and stared at the ceiling. No matter how much of a great time I had today, I’m still worried about what my dad Jarren told me last night and I haven’t seen him for breakfast.

The next day around five in the evening, Mr. Xander pulled into the Gulf gas station. When I took a peek at the fuel gauge, I saw that it was above the halfway mark. And we are less than thirty minutes from my house. I know we weren’t stopping for gas and the way he steered the car away from the gas pumps to park near a telephone booth, so many things ran through my mind.

“Michael, I have something to tell you.” He started off to say.

“Yeah?”

He turned his full body to face me. He had a solemn expression on his face like something was weighing heavy on his mind.

“This is something I wanted to say for so long. And, it is killing me to get it off my chest. After having a quick talk with your mom yesterday before we left, she told me that it was revealed that your dad, Jarren isn’t your father.”

“Oh! Uh, yeah. I found out the previous night. Why did my mom tell you?” I wanted to know. I knew they were friends, or whatever they are, no one told me, but their weird friendship is making me question a lot of things. And just like with my sibling, we were taught not to get into grown folks’ business.

“Because she-” he paused, and then sighed. He cocked his head to the side and stated, “Michael, I am your father.” He said it with such a straight face I couldn’t help but laugh. I threw my hands over my face and continue to laugh.

“Michael, I’m serious. You know what? Let’s get you home and get our answer while we’re at it. Shall we?” Mr. Xander was serious. I can see it in his eyes. For as long as I have known him, when he was serious, he was serious. He had joked around about things before, but this new to me.

Arriving at my house, I saw my mom walking up and down the driveway glancing down the street probably looking for me. My dad, well, my dad Jarren, or whatever it is I can call him, was bent down digging up something by a bush. When they saw the car stopped by the sidewalk, they paused.

I saw a look of horror stretched across my mom’s face. And my “dad” Jarren appeared angry as he would normally be when I’m gone too long without him knowing about it. When I got out and got my tote bags and extra bags for myself and the family, Mr. Xander rose out of the car like he was on a mission.

Next thing I knew, my “dad” angrily approached him and started shouting.

“What the hell your ass doing here?”

“Excuse me, Jarren. Karena, tell Michael that I’m his biological father.” When Mr. Xander said that, we all looked to my mom who just stared back at us.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Cynthia walking up. Damn, if only I knew before now.

TO BE CONTINUED.

©2020 Pamela E. Hester

 

The Genesis of Michael J’s Life #amwriting #fiction #MichaelJseries


Image by Anja🤗#helpinghands #solidarity#stays healthy🙏 from Pixabay

Michael came from parents who harbored a deep secret. The man who he thought was his father turned out not to be his father. This man, Jarren Johanssen, raised him as his own, but it had been tough not only for Jarren but for Karena, Michael’s mom.

When her husband would go away on a business trip and would often be away from his family, Karena had soon become lonely. She would go to work to take care of their three children at that time that would leave her feeling weary. She had few friends she would hang out with, and a mother who occasionally would help out with the children. But, Karena needed a different kind of attention and love. While at work, she was being seduced by her boss on several occasions and had finally given in to him that night of the day her husband left for a business trip to California.

A few weeks later, she found out she was pregnant. Being hit with the conception date had hit her hard because she knew who fathered her child. And she was hoping it would have been her husband since they had an intimate moment before he left to go on his business trip.

It was the summer of 1978 in Houston, Texas when Michael found out about this at a barbeque after he graduated from high school. He had never felt so devastated since receiving this information. So, he had a sit-down with his parents and demanded answers.

“I can’t believe what I’ve heard. Is it true? I need to know!” Michael questioned as they sat away from everyone at a picnic table. He somberly sat down, shaking his head in bewilderment. He used his thumb and middle finger to massage the throb that threatened to come.

Karena had downcast eyes as she knew this day would become exposed someday. She also hated the fact that her son-in-law had blurted this secretive and personal information out to everyone. She would have to have a talk with her daughter about airing the family’s dirty laundry even to people like her son-of -law. The thing with that is, her daughter must have overheard it at some point because Karena had never told any of them.

Jarren gave his wife a sidelong glance and set his eyes back on Michael. He leaned forward and clasped his hands together on the table, trying to figure out how to say to a child the hate he has for his biological father. Or, how he truly feels about all of this. Nevertheless, it wasn’t Michael’s fault he was born. Jarren felt a rush of emotions hitting him all at once.

“Michael, I want you to know that I love you very much. I know this comes as a shock to you about me not being your biological dad, but we have gotten through the worst before. And, I’m not going to lie. It was hard raising another man’s son who, um, slept with my wife. And, er- in the beginning, I didn’t want anything to do with you. But when you were thirteen months old, and I was going through depression, you walked up and comforted me. It was the way you did it that helped-” Jarren paused because he was starting to get choked up.

Karena didn’t know whether to console her husband since she’s to blame for him to feel this way. It still hurts like hell to see her husband like this. Over the years, and after they had one more child when Michael was turning two-years-old, they had worked through it. Or so she thought. It had been hard, she won’t front, but what made it worse was Michael’s birth father kept popping up demanding to be in his son’s life.

Michael turned to his mom and saw sadness swimming in her eyes. Her long jet-black flowing hair was waving in the wind like a flag. He wanted to hear what she had to say because he needed to know not only why he was conceived the way he was, but why she never mentioned anything to him. Or at least try to. His stomach started to knot up as he expelled a long sigh.

Jarren took a quick glance at his wife with hurt and anger etched on his face. He then stood up and walked away. He has always been a proud man and not one to show his emotions much- at least not pain and sadness.

“Michael, I promise to talk about this to you. Right now, I want to wait until most of the people are gone so I can have that talk with you. Okay?” Karena reached out to caress the side of her son’s face. She is a private person and doesn’t like talking about herself or her family’s business around people who she feels is not family in that sense.

“Okay, mom,” Michael said quietly, closing his eyes when his mom planted a kiss on the top of his head. He didn’t know how to process it, and since his mom wanted to wait to talk about it, that time may not come anytime soon. He patted the head of his Saarloos Wolfdog, Rocko while he stayed at the picnic table deep in his thoughts about his life taken a drastic turn.

The next morning after breakfast as Karena and one of her daughters was cleaning the kitchen, there was a loud knock at the front door. She yells out to Michael to answer it.

She wasn’t quite in the mood for company and was hoping it would be a friend of one of her children coming to see them. But as she moves out of the kitchen and was heading toward the front door, she overheard a familiar voice.

“Hey, Michael! How’ve you been, son?” Standing at the door was a handsome dark-haired man with olive skin, gazing at her son with fatherly love in his eyes.

“I’ve been good, sir,” Michael responded. He glanced at his mom and saw she had reached his side with confusion and terror on her face.

“That’s good! Hi, Karena. Good seeing you again,” the guy said, staring into her dark brown eyes in a way that always made her feel uncomfortable.

“Michael, will you give me a moment with Mr. Xander, please?”

“Sure, mom.”

When Michael was out of earshot, Karena looked to the guy she fought so hard to rid herself of. The guy who, no matter where she goes, he would always seem to find her, and she that she exorcised out of her system.

“You have some nerve being here. What if my husband comes home and sees you darkening our doorstep?” She hissed at him.

“I’ve been to Michael’s graduation away from your family. Now, I’m here to see him in person. I want to spend time with our son… today.”

TO BE CONTINUED.

©2020 Pamela E. Hester

 

Reblog: The Eccentric Soul of Michael J- #MondayBlogs #fiction


Good morning/afternoon everyone! I hope your weekend went well. As most of you know, I have started a series four years ago called the Michael J series. It had turned out to be a series I had stopped for reasons outside of this blog. My sincerest apologies to those who wanted to read the series.

I won’t give a long drawn out monologue about what was going back in 2016 that placed this series and other things on paused is/has working/worked itself out.
Now, in 2020, I have a better and sort of clear vision on the Michael J series and anything else I would like to share as they come up.

I hope you all would like to read this series. I plan on going back to writing this series and will keep you updated.
Thank you, and take care.

P.S. The original post had ended up uploading again though it’s been updated. My apologies for you seeing it twice.