Health, Beach Trip And Other Things


Image by GimpWorkshop from Pixabay

Last month, my daughter and I had done something for the first time together and that was taking a much-needed trip to the beach. Our trip to Myrtle Beach, SC, in which we spent 3 nights, was something that had its moments but was well spent. The only thing I wish was that we could have stayed there longer.

But first, I’m would like to update you on some things that I haven’t mentioned or haven’t in a long time. My anxiety has gotten worse since last year which led to going back into depression. I had been on this anxiety/depression medication since last November, but the dose was low.

The side effects from it definitely got me to question it, but I kept taking them. I hated the feeling of being sad and crying off and on, and sometimes for no reason. Sometimes I would go through so many different emotions in one day I wanted to crawl into bed and sleep it all away.

Around me, there was one problem after another. And some problems were happening in my family that affected me in some way as well. For instance, last school term, my daughter had been dealing with one issue after another with students at her school. She had gotten into a fight with a girl. She had been bullied, as she had before in elementary school and last school term.

The entire school term for 2021-’22 was horrible. The school officials weren’t doing their job. I tried just about everything I could… My daughter was so stressed, that her anxiety got worse and she went into depression. Now, she has been getting therapy sessions and I still do.

Another day another post for that. It’s getting me a bit emotional.

Taken by me at Myrtle Beach, SC

That weekend beach trip was relaxing and fun for both of us. It had been years since we have been to the beach or anywhere that was more than 10 miles from our home rather. That Friday, our transportation had gotten us there early, like around 11:00 am. And the hotel’s check-in time was 4pm. So the front desk allowed us to leave our suitcases with them and my daughter and I walk to get lunch and just walk around to check out places around the boardwalk.

Ripley’s Believe It Or Not
View from our room balcony.

That evening, we rode on the Skywheel for the first time. If you’ve never been to one, you’ll love it.

View from the Skywheel

The next day we visited the Hollywood Wax Museum. We’ve done three attractions in one place: the wax museum itself, Hannah’s Hall of Mirrors, and the Outbreak-Dread The Undead. The Outbreak consisted of “zombies” so-called scaring you. The only thing that scared…ahem, scared me was the women screaming in my group. Lol. I felt like we were extras in a scene in a sci-fi movie. The entire experience at the museum was enjoyable and fun for everyone.

Later that night, my daughter and I got into the pool at our hotel. It was going well at first until my daughter almost drowned. It was scary and thinking about it still, reminded me of when someone threw me (when I was her age) into a pool and I thought I was going to drown. My daughter and I don’t know how to swim. Though, it’s not her first time being in a pool. She had even dunked her head underwater then, but last month was a different story. She pushed off into the water and lost control. I was sitting near the edge, the part where the steps are, and reached out to grab onto her. Her arms and legs were flailing and with one last grab on her jeans shorts, I tugged hard and got her to safety. That was a scary moment.

After recovering from that, the next day, (Sunday) we went to the Family Kingdom Amusement Park. A few of the rides we had gotten on were quite fun. The park is old (opened in 1966) and most of the rides are close to showing their age, but they run pretty well.

My daughter never rode on a rollercoaster before, so I had gotten her hyped up weeks before our trip about getting on one. I love rollercoasters; they’re one of my thrills. By the time we got in line to get on the rollercoaster, my short self stood on the tips of my toes to see the coaster we were getting on. You know, to see the mechanics of them up close.

Well, by the time we got even closer, I looked down, and my first thought was I wasn’t going to fit. But I got in anyway because my daughter really wanted to ride. And… I couldn’t fit, at least not comfortably. My thighs were squished together. My breasts were in the way and my stomach isn’t close to being flat. My butt just couldn’t fit at all. The seats are small, yeah, but I could have fit if the divider was between us. Then again, probably not.

Anyway, by the time I was easing out of my seat while letting my daughter know I can’t ride, an attendant came up. The look on the guy’s face was a look of disgust. I will never forget that face.

My daughter never got on because she wanted her first experience to be with me riding with her. Just know, I had struggled with my weight for some time. When I was in that toxic environment with a gaslighting, abusive man, I stressed ate until I finally moved out last year. Since then, I had worked on getting healthy, in which I had improved in some areas.

It’s a process, but I am confident I will get there, and get my weight down. I just don’t want to go back to being thin as I was before my daughter was born. I just want to be at a healthy weight. I had even gotten a treadmill when I don’t want to do my walks outside.

Okay, I don’t want to ramble, but that is what had been going on with me lately. One more thing, I have also been working on taking one day at a time. The future isn’t promised to us, so we really don’t have all the time in the world. We all have to live life on our own terms and do so how we see fit.

Tell me, how have you been?

It’s My Birthday Weekend & A Freebie!


Scheduled post.

Good morning/afternoon/evening everyone! How are you? I am stoked (or at least I want to be) because with everything going on with my family life and such, today, I plan on doing something other than sulking. Tomorrow (April 3rd) is my birthday, and with my anxiety/depression issues, my daughter and I are celebrating my birthday a day early. And that is because if I don’t get to do anything the day of, at least I have done something the day before.

Monday, I am going with my mother who is having surgery done. I hope everything goes well with that. I can’t begin to say what else is going on, because I’m still trying to wrap my head around it. You know when one thing happens, five more and another five followed. Those things had occasionally affected my mental health, and I have been working on that. The medication for anxiety/depression isn’t working like it should. I have been taking them since last November.

Okay, enough of all of that. I want to think happy thoughts for a change, and don’t want to sound down when there are others who are going through something as well.

Today, my daughter and I are going shopping, and to see the movie, Morbius. And do whatever else I would like to do. This is the first time in a very long time, I get to do what I want and feel like doing for my birthday. I used to spend it sitting around where I used to live with someone who do not like me leaving the house unless he said so.

Okay, I’m beginning to ramble…

So, also for the weekend, I am catching up on books I haven’t finished reading and new books. And well into next week while I sit in with my mom while she recovers. (It may take several weeks for her recovery though.)

For my birthday, I am doing what I normally do like I do other parts of the year, which is donating to charity. Other than donating money, clothes, and non-perishable, I like that in my area, the money people donate goes to help abused women and children. And help people pay their bills, medications, and such.

And, drum roll, please. Okay, just kidding. Also for my birthday weekend, my ebook, Secrets Unveil will be available for free starting today and up until Wednesday (4/6). So, if you don’t have a copy and would like to get one, now is your chance.

Available at Amazon.

Thank you for reading this post. I hope you have a good rest of your weekend. Stay safe and be well.

Love,

Pamela 🌹

Happy Blogversary, K. Phoenix! 🎉🎉


Whew! Where has the time gone? I can’t believe it has been a whole decade since I started this blog. I didn’t know what the heck I wanted this blog to be about, but I am glad the direction it is going now. Even with the ups and downs, it had taught me a lot, and I had learned a lot over the years. I’m still learning actually.

As some of you may know, and my new followers who don’t know, within the 10 years, I had gone months, close to a year without blogging. There are times when life gets in the way and you simply cannot blog or write. There were times when I wanted to and couldn’t because of what was going on in my life during those times.

So, I would like to give a huge thank you for rocking (and rolling 😄) with me, even when I’m absent sometimes.

As you know blogging and writing, in general, can be hard at times. And, it is also what I love as well. I also love getting to know you all and reading whatever you choose to share with the world. Some of you I have known here for almost ten years and interacted with outside of WordPress but in other parts of the cyber world.

Cheers to 10 years of blogging on here. And hopefully, cheers to another 10, loves!!

–Pamela

Oh, How The Time Had Flown!


Video by PIRO4D from Pixabay

Oh my goodness! I can’t believe 13 years had flown by just like that. I am officially a mother of a teenager and the feeling is indescribable. The moment she was placed in my arms, so many emotions had ran through I believe I temporarily lost my breath.

Taken by my mom.

My daughter was supposed to be born the next day, (because the doctor was going to induce my labor) but she arrived into the world the night before. She always never did like being told what to do and is still the same way. Lol. She tends to do things on her own time.

I always thought being a mother was hard, and it is but rewarding. I don’t know what I would do or what my life would be like if my daughter wasn’t in it.

She is beautiful, smart, creative, intelligent, sassy, strong, etc, and I am blessed to be chosen as her mother. I wish the best for her, and I thank God for getting us this far.

Omg! I am still overwhelmed about having a teenager. I went through the photo album and had gotten emotional looking through the photos of the years leading up to now. I had truly did my best to be the best mother a child can have because growing up, I didn’t have good mother figures.

To my daughter: I am so proud of you and I wish you all the best life can offer you. Be bold and daring. Be courageous and take life one step at a time. I have much more to teach you, and so do life. Keep at you goals and never give up. I’m crying now, but know how much one can pray for the safety of a child when that child is not around them. I wish you all the love, strength, passion for your dreams to come through, peace, good health, and happiness. I may be missing something but you get it.

So, Happy Birthday, my little queen! Mommy loves you sooooo much! Hugs and kisses. 💗❤️❤️

How I Spent Valentine’s Day And My Weekend


pixabay.com

I am late posting about Valentine’s Day. I know, I know. I have no explanation other than that I was procrastinating.

Last Saturday, my daughter and I spent the day with my mom and brothers. We walked to my dad’s grave to finally put a headstone there. It was an emotional moment and I wish my sister could have made it.

After staying for several moments, I was relieved our dad finally received what we tried to get for him after so many years had passed. But better late than never. We then walked back to my mom’s home.

Sunday, I spent most of the day braiding my daughter’s hair and putting it in a crochet hairstyle. After that, we ate veggie lasagna (since I’m trying to eat healthily) and spent the rest of the day watching Don’t Breathe 2 and having our Valentine’s Day ritual since we won’t be able to spend the actual holiday together. (She lives at our old residence with her dad because she wants to continue to go to her old school.)

On Monday, I spent Valentine’s Day with my mom and brothers for the entire day. We shopped and went out to Golden Corral since that’s where my brothers wanted to go. I am not much of a fan of the restaurant now.

At the end of the day, I was thankful and felt blessed to have spent the day with my family and the day before with my daughter. Love comes in many forms, and I had once told my daughter that Valentine’s Day is not just for relationships and marriages. It’s for anyone and everyone.

I told her that because she shared with me her thoughts and feelings about why her dad and I never spent Valentine’s day like what she saw with other people. She never saw the cards, teddy bears, getting dressed up to go out in the town, etc. She never saw her parents actually show love on any day. Not kiss and definitely not hugging much when we were together.

I spent Valentine’s day with those who mattered the most. Because why should anyone feel bad because they are single on Valentine’s Day. A person can show themselves love and it does feel good to have someone express love to you. And even though I only know love coming from my parents, child, and siblings, and loving myself, I understand it and growing without feeling like I’m not worthy of it.

Still, those three days was fun and amazing. And I am blessed to have spent the days with my family.