A Sexier You


woman relaxing

Sit back and relax…it has been a long day.

Now, we all are humans. I hope. (Smiles) We are all adults,  so why are some of us are squeamish when it comes to being open-minded to new things? Whether you are in a relationship, married, or have a partner, we all know, old routines no longer work after a certain time. It’s like when you first get into a relationship, (or at first, dating) you do the usual routine, like for instance: spending long hours talking on the phone, thinking only of that person all day, going on dates, skipping, (lol) etc. After the newness wears off, you and your person become comfortable around one another. Too comfortable.

It’s to the point where you’re letting yourself go, or the other person letting his or herself go. Or, you find yourself picking up behind that person. Please, don’t do that. You should never get too “comfortable” to the point where you stop getting your hair done, cutting your hair, getting your nails done, you get the picture. No matter where you are in the social status, hopefully before you get marry, you should always make sure you are looking your best.

Now, I’m not saying (women and men) that you should sit in the house dress like you’re going out to a gala or  somewhere extravagant. Just don’t break out into old habits. Being sexy means more than wearing skimpy clothes, women, and walking around with your abs on blast, men. Being sexy means taking the time out to keep up with your appearance. Whatever you were doing in the beginning for that person to be appealing, don’t stop. You do not want your partner to direct his or her attention at the next person because he or she like what they see.

Here are some tips you can use to stay that sexier you:

  • Be you. Don’t be like no other person but you. There’s nothing sexier than a person you are now. Accept who you are first; don;t expect someone to when you don’t.
  • Hygiene matters to the bone.
  • Wear clothes that compliment you. You should never wear clothes that doesn’t agree with you. It will throw your appearance far off.
  • As stated earlier, DO NOT stop looking your very best. That what makes you, you. From your hair to your shoes, your sense of style and appearance can go a long way.
  • Buy sexy lingerie for yourself, women. Men, it’s okay to buy your lady lingerie also. You may get a show of your life!
  • Take a candlelit bubble bath soaking in invigorating oils. Be stress free. No one wants to walk around all day looking tired and wash-out. Take the time to re-energize an invigorate yourself.

You don’t have to go around looking like the people on those reality shows,  like The Real Housewives of…  Even they have an off day. Be you.  Be happy. Be true.

relaxing by the tub

When Love Hurts


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Love has never been my best friend. In fact, I don’t believe we even know each other. I mean it’s not like I searched out looking for love, if so, I had looked in the wrong place.

Let’s face it. We are only lucky if we are bitten by the little love bug. I have spent the majority of my life being a pushover or a doormat. I couldn’t catch a lucky break to save my life. It has gotten to the point where I had to take a breather from the deck of cards life had dealt me. Still… no luck. Love hurts…bad.

Have any of you ever felt the sweet warmth of love that envelops you like a cloak of protectiveness?
I haven’t quite experience it yet but I know the yearning. A feeling that most people spent their entire life searching for, it’s like searching for your soul mate. But, it’s either near or far, the latter usually being a state or two away.
Yet, you may believe you are ready to take that chance to jump into a relationship, but it’s like jumping off a cliff where there is water below, and huge rocks awaits you to make that fall.
I had taken risks but if I know now what I’ve known several years ago, many heartaches and headaches wouldn’t had existed.

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I wouldn’t have been left with a heavy heart filled with pain and sorrow, and painful memories flooding my mind. I wouldn’t have felt so defeated, feeling that the world is on my shoulders and pushing me into the ground. I wouldn’t have taken that path of no return wondering when I was going to see my way to a better and brighter day. What I do know now is that you only get stronger. Your painful experiences with strengthen you; and gives you knowledge on what to avoid and what to expect.

Love hurts but it doesn’t have to be. Look at the couples you see in your surroundings. They are happy, they work out their differences, and they communicate.
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But, they will have hiccups along the way, who doesn’t, but one has to have understanding, patience, faith, and be able to sacrifice. They are willing to do whatever it takes to make what they put together work for the long run. They don’t give up when things are going at its toughest. No, they persevere until everything is right where it should be, and how it should be.
Nothing is easy. If you have that person who is willing to make a relationship work no matter what, then you have a good thing.
Keep love circulating.

Until we meet again.

Pamela

Back In Effect


Lately, I have gone through times that I thought was over, but, unfortunately it never stop. Now, I’m to the point where I can say, ” Okay, don’t sweat the small stuff. Move forward and aim higher. Sometimes, it seems like easier said than done, but you all can relate to this.

Sometimes, it seems like your troubles can get the best of you and won’t let go. I’ve felt what that was like. Feeling my way through the brushes and debris, but kept pressing on. Life can take its toll and have you wondering, “why me?”

Remember, life is what you make of it. If you wake up every morning with positive affirmations, then expect good things to happen. You are manifesting it to come to past; in a good way. But, when you are always thinking negative then of course, you can expect negative things to come to you.
I had to learn the hard way. It wasn’t until I hit rock bottom hard that I had to change my way of thinking and let good come into play.
Most times, it can even be the people in your life- the ones that seem to take up space. The ones who have so much to say but nothing to offer. Nevertheless, they don’t make up your life. Nor can can they place you in Heaven or Hell.

But, anyway, I’m still getting there; to a point in my life that I can stop looking in the rear view mirror, and get my life back on track. Moreover, by not letting all the negatives make their way back into my light of happiness.

We all should give life to hope, love, happiness and dedication. Rest assured, nothing is easy as saying it, but if we can just take that first step; we are on our way to a better way of life.

P.S. It feels good to be back to connect with you all again. Thank you for hanging in there with me.

Healthy Relationships & Sex Life


Links for health wellness for better sex for couples and the rest of us:

When I had read all the health benefits for love and sex on iVillage, I’ve done a mental checklist. One will never know how much it takes to keep up a healthy  love/sex life. It takes quite a deal to keep something you’re suppose to take serious going in the right direction. But, we can still reap from the benefits of frequent love-making with our mates that can seriously improve our lives in more ways than one.

The ten top health benefits below that it takes to keep seeking that emotional and physical connection with another person are:

#1 Less stress

I read that studies show that good constant sex keeps the stress level down. Nothing wrong with that. And, it’s not just the physical, touching and kissing plays its part and goes a long way. So, have much of those.

#2 Longer life

I don’t know why, but studies shows men who have frequent intercourse live longer than men who didn’t. Although, studies didn’t show that for women. Hmm…

#3 More youthful appearance

#4 Stronger muscles for men and women 

#5 Clearer thinking

#6 Improved heart health

Although sex may not qualify as an intense cardio workout, it does offer a demonstrable benefit to your heart.  Those who had sex at least twice a week had a much lower risk of developing cardiovascular disease than men who had sex once a month or less.

#7 Stronger relationships

Relationship satisfaction is strengthened when both partners are sexually satisfied. We all know that. A strong, healthy relationship is one in which the partners show respect and kindness toward each other. The relationship forms a rewarding and enduring bond of trust and support.

#8 Pain relief

#9 Stronger immunity

#10 Reduced risk of some cancers

Despite the fact that I haven’t listed everything in detail under each benefits, I wanted to entail the key benefits that’s the most important. For others, you may get the point. As you can see, having a healthy love or sex life can be very beneficial. It’s also never to be taken lightly. Even though satisfying as sex can be, being in love, I mean truly in love tops them all.  If you don’t have true, real love, then all the above won’t mean a thing.